Poem: Understand My Insanity

I want you to see this life through my eyes.
Have my demons follow you everywhere
And I want to hear you call His name.
Maybe this time He'll care.
I want you to see all the blood I saw
Dropping from her mouth to the floor.
Feel all the anger I felt

As he laughed and begged for more.



I want you to fear the night as I did

Not knowing if anyone could hear you,
Begging God to take you away
Or choking yourself hoping you'll turn blue.
Would you bear the pain?
Will you pull out a gun?
I forced my myself to believe it was over
Even though it had just begun.
I want you to talk to the devil
Befriend him like I did,
Beg God for forgiveness
Even if you didn't really mean it.
Tell me how you feel.
Do you still feel strong?
Have you gone insane?
Do you still know right from wrong?
Only then can you judge me.
Fully understand my pain.
When you see and felt what I did
I'm sure you won't think I'm insane.
I don't justify my actions
They are done and in the past.
I don't regret them
Because the remorse never seems to last.